Sunday, October 16, 2011

The Dixie Dicks Captain's Log Week 1

Captain's Log Week 1, Jay Sharp

Luck was on my side @ Freddy's Back Room when I picked 4 talented, driven individuals to create my band. Fate would have it that three of them work  at Guitar Center. Still, none of us had ever played together.

We weren't able to meet up right away, Pete was in L.A. playing the premiere for a new Adult Swim show his Early Man bandmate is doing the music for and Siraj had to go to Pennsylvania to get his violin so I decided to shit-talk all the other bands on Facebook to kill time and make me feel better about myself.

I was initially concerned about meshing a drummer who's stats said he liked to play reggae with a metal-head and a bass player who likes three part harmonies. Did I mention Siraj plays violin in our band? 

Our first idea (in an attempt to upstage the mOrgans) was to pull out our cocks and wear two (2!) strap-on dildos on our foreheads- therefore coming up with our first rejected band-name "Fifteen Dicks". We all got a little camera shy when it came time for the photo shoot.  We decided to shelf that idea along with my fantabulous idea to cover "I want to know what love is" by Foreigner. 

At first, we all wanted to be a Williamsburg band, but when we realized we could all actually play our instruments we started rehearsing in Astoria, but of course we were run out by all the yuppies who had just moved there from Park Slope. It was pretty clear, we were going to be a Manhattan band.

Step one was to hold a band meeting. Where would we hold it?
My mom and dad's house in Florida was out, so Siraj volunteered to hold it at his crib in midtown.

NYC- home of rats the size of cats and dogs the size of… things that are generally much smaller than dogs. NY, home of the best rock band known to man, the Strokes. New York, where Alicia Keys and Jay-Z can turn a lame song from 1968 and turn it into a number one billboard single. NY: where the band formerly known as Fifteen Dicks was to rehearse.

After discussing what side of Manhattan has the best Heroin, we jumped in our windowless van filled with candy and chloroform and sang along to the first (blue) Weezer album in our best Barry Gibbs voices. We drove off into the NY Band Draft sunset- on course to RAWK!

We will know more about our sound next week.

Poindexter Twinklebottom aka Jay

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